I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
