i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
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