Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
