yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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