I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
