Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
