the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
