We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
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