I smell stomach acid.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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