Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
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