Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize