ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
