Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
