When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Church boner. Awkwardddd
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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