Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
it was like eating out sand paper
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
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