Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
