are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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