If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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