trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize