Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
