My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Life is so much better after having sex.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Randomize
