when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
