called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
