i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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