Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
