shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize