Kareoke will never be a sober sport
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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