I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
