Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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