your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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