can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
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