Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
