1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
