how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Randomize
