do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
