you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
