He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Randomize
