It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
