Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
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