I'm really into asian looking animals
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
