he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
