when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
