Apparently you make a good broom.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
