When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
