did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
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