oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize