He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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