playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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