alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
