apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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