My boss' voice literally gives me gas
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
sick fucks of a feather flock together
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
