you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
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