True but thats because hes a fetus.
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
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